Ok, so now I had a name for what was going on with my body. I still didn't have an explanation... at least an explanation that I necessarily agreed with, but hey, I had a name, that was something to start with. So I did what any normal human in the 20th century does - I asked Google. And what does the first few options that Google gives me tell me? That it's psychological and caused by traumas. Well, wait a minute now...
So then I go to neurosymptoms.org, one of the websites that the neurologist gave me. Why, you ask, didn't I go there first? Well because I'm hard headed of course! And because I must have wanted to frustrate myself first.
On that website, by FND Hope, I found more information. Information that made more sense. Research that helped me understand. So then I got intrigued. And I started researching. I wanted to understand what was going on. I wanted to know what went wrong. I wanted answers. I wanted to know how to treat it and how to help myself. So I went searching for information. And the more I searched, I came to some realizations:
FND has been around for a long, long, LLLLOOOOOONNNNNGGGG time (since Plato and Aristotle times in fact), and has had many different names along the way.
Because of the different names and views/theories that came along with the names, there is a lot of stigma attached to FND (i.e. hysteria, conversion disorder, etc.).
There is not much research or information related to FND to find, and what is available is often based on the outdated views.
Let's put that together. For a disorder to have been around since Plato times to now... and not have much research done on it in that amount of time in and of itself is just mind blowing to me. To have it be a completely debilitating disorder, and just leave patients alone to deal with it the best way that they can, is incomprehensible to me. Not just for a year or two. Not just for a decade or two. For centuries.
It sounds like a mental health commercial...
Having seizures? No problem. Experiencing muscle weakness or paralysis? We got you! Abnormal movements, tics, muscle spasms? We'll take care of it! Problems walking? Can't talk or problems swallowing? Come to therapy. We'll fix you up, all through CBT... even though we don't know what FND is.
This is why awareness is so important. And this is why I decided to collaborate with Not Defined By FND. I believe in their mission and their goals, and am excited to help them in achieving them!
Each one, teach one!!!
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